My AA sponser was an Aries...Practical and down to earth, but in some ways her wit was above my head. Phyllis was 33 and I was 21 when we met. During my early days in AA, she walked me through my journey. Later she told me she kept AA literature by the phone to answer my questions.
Aries is on my mind and approaching with April.
As our friendship progressed through the years, she changed her life and her husband. I learned more about astrology and metaphysics. Time parted us in a gentle way. At first her life was her children, I traveled the country with my work, and when I came back my life was my children. With my head injury, so many of my memories were faded or lost anyway and it is only in the last year that they became real again.
A few telephone conversations and my regret that I did not keep up with her were our only contact. The truth is tho an Aries was very much there to save my life at the end of the 70's and the beginning of the 80's. Maybe I took her for granted. I remember a party she had where I read her friend's cards. And we would go antiquing together. I remember crazy Arlin, who stalked us both, and eventually became the first post office employee I ever heard of that "went postal". Thank God they got the weapons away from him before he hurt someone.
I always told Phyl that most Aries have something about their foreheads that stands out...She had a car accident in 1986 and she told me that she finally had her scar. She was at my wedding, with her new life shining brightly in her eyes.
My daughter is an Aries/Ox (Sami) of the impulsive nature and the brave truths. Sami with the incredible humour and the amazing insight to other people. Sami, who lost her sobriety 2 weeks short of a year and acquired a scar on her forehead. I have spent the last year trying to help Sami find her truths and protect her from the world. The funny thing is she knows she is gay. She understands and touches other people with a charisma that reminds me of my old friends, long gone from this earth.
This has been a bad month for loss. It started in February, the weekly calls to funerals. Five deaths in 6 weeks I think...Starting with my old friend's Dad (the grandfather of my neices) and moving through my Mom's extended family. My Mothers family shrinks and somehow as they slip away it is renewing her mind. She seems to be digging in her heels and moving towards positive energy.
Today we got the call that my cousin, Ted has died. Twenty years ago when his fiancee died he turned a corner. His lifepartner Tom is another man. They have had a wonderful relationship and built a life together. Now hours after his death, his brother is bringing a truck to Ted and Tom's house to clean out the furniture. I suspect there will be police involved and some of my cousins are traveling now to be with Ted's partner Tom. It will be a family fiasco and the phone rings throughout the day to update my Mom. I hear snippets of conversations....." If I was Tom, I would call the police in advance...Of all things, Tom and Ted were married no matter what the law says..." Like all minorities my mother is against gays in general and their greatest advocate when they become specific individuals.
My Nigerian clients are keeping me busy. One of the partners hired a man to market the lease hall. He promptly started renting it and did not bother with passing the income to the owner of the business. She changed the locks....On Friday he broke down the back door (as I warned her he would) and opened up the hall to collect the $700 rental. As we inspected the damage on Saturday, I received a new contract from her. They still have a large outstanding balance that has always been a collection nightmare. But Ellen is my friend and I know I will get paid for everything eventually....I will do more work for her, because she needs me and because I trust her Aries heart.
So March has given me a quickening. I still see the colors and feel the wind and have become one with my visions. I am writing fiction, such as it is... March has given Sami a fall, from sobriety and from a safe place. March has left my Hunter grown taller and quicker. March has left my Mother more passionate and more determined. March has left my Carly windblown by life and looking for a direction.
I wonder fleetingly, if some of the brilliant lights that hated me so easily have perhaps left me cursed....But then I know that the change of the seasons will change things for the better. I am just a woman who sees signs everywhere and fancies things that are not real...
The "Ides of March" are moving across my life and I look forward to a peaceful April.
Coloconnect
