I sleep in my office...a large room with red brick walls that was once a covered patio. Sliding glass doors (always open into the house)...Sliding glass doors (usually closed into the back yard). My neighbors, in the back have a six foot wooden fence built against the chainlink fence that sourrounds our yard. This ancient wooden fence has almost fallen down. There is no alley between the cul-de-sacs. So when it is dark if my lights are on they have a great view of my bed. I can see into their backyard and den when I go out to smoke.
My neighbors behind me are a curious couple that have grown to look alike over the years. A man and woman with unisex graying hair and his and her tee shirts. They don't like it when the teenagers play basketball in the alley. I love the tall young men with ponytails and pierced ears that taught Hunter how to play. Mexican boys with Indian looks that hold him on their shoulders and lower their hoop. Sometimes he sits on his basketball and waits his turn. They came to his birthday party and ran through the yard with water guns.
It was Sheron who is black, and Sondra who is Mexican, and old man Harlan that were waiting for me to bring my baby home from the hospital with her baby. It was Gwenn (Big Momma) who is black, who hugged me while I cried. It was Debbie and Rebec, my long time Mexican friends who brought baby gifts. The nurturing spirits come in all colors, but I am often drawn to the dark.
My neighbors meet with Laura Miller (Dallas's Mayor) at Crimewatch meetings to bemoan how the apartments up the street have ruined their property values. In this island subdivision which backs up to the Dallas Athletic Club (a semi exclusive golf course country club) the neighbors struggle with how to protect themselves from "those people". Crimewatch is a good thing. It is true that it has had a lot of impact on the robbery rates (most take place in daylight hours though) and the drug dealing at the local park.
But the sense that the neighborhood is embattled prevails. Through the night, I am awakened by the strobing lights that are passed car to car among our protectors. My neighbor sometimes lets his vicious dogs run free at night. Once at 3 AM one morning I was stuck in my car until he finally rounded them up.
The next day he tried to give me a lecture on morality and being out so late. What would my children think? In this strange place you are more likely to meet your end, attacked by wild dogs, than jumped by violent criminals. I am struck by the irony.
I hang out with the rainbow coalition over here. Recovering alcoholics, crack heads considering sobriety, all colors and races of people. The Nigerians arrive by the car loads. Sometimes we have middle aged men sitting in the front yard smoking cigarettes and pondering their lives. Sometimes there is a wall eyed German woman in work out clothes climbing trees. The teenagers still gravitate here from time to time.....it is becoming difficult to even guess at the mixes and the matches. Hunter is the perfect color to me.
I used to let John stay overnight before he moved to another town. When the kids and my Mom were fast asleep he would park in the back. My neighbors called crimewatch and they shined there floodlights on us as I sneaked him into the gate. They blared the loudspeakers and asked "Who goes there?" I never could tell who was in the crimewatch vehicle that night. But the kids were awakened and my mother was embarassed. So we spend time together in other places since then.
Anyway last night my unisex neighbors were lurking around in the back yard. He was digging a hole at midnight. I went outside and said hello (he was only about 30 feet away). He went into the house in a dead run. It occurred to me that he might be burying his wife in the back yard. I was in a "Rear Window" kinda mood......
So I called crimewatch.....Bill has police scanners and probably a trunk full of weapons...he also has mean dogs. Bill is a whole other story. He still denies having my next door neighbor (his cousin) raided by the swat team. Next door neighbor told me the whole story, which included a sucessful lawsuit against the City of Dallas.
Oh well, I thought Bill would get me the quickest response. I told him someone was lurking in the back yards. Lurking being the operative word. Ten minutes after I called him, the flood lights were on. I didn't hear any bull horn but the crimewatch car was in the alley for half an hour.
I am feeling better these days. More alive. Meaner maybe. I am planning my week. I am finishing invoices today. I will spend sometime with Carly at her apartment. I will collect all the rents and finalize that deal on the 3rd. I will go with Steffi to her Phase II meeting. I will work on my fiction story. I will explore Renegade's links and try to find my voice again. While I was writing this I spent a lot of time dancing with Hunter to Barney and Dragon Tales music.
I am a slow learner, but I feel myself moving closer to a quickening..maybe ..whatever it is I am grateful and I will not turn away...
